May 21, 2015

Anger With a Loving God

"The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them;
    he delivers them from all their troubles."
Psalm 34:17

When you look at the title of this blog, you may seem a little confused.  What could this blog possibly be about?

We all have times in our lives, as believers in Christ, where we go through difficult situation.  And sometimes those situations just seem to come one after another.  Things start to get better only to get worse again.  Some may feel as if they grow through them more often than others, but take comfort in the fact that we as Christians all go through them.  But being angry with God?



We question at some points in our lives why God puts us through certain situations and I for one can say I have been angry at him for what feels like constantly worrying about how I'm going to pay my bills, why I can't seem to find a good job and keep one (I've had 4 different jobs since moving here 2 years ago).
Here is my back story.

Not too long after I turned eleven years old, my father past away.  It still hurts me to this day because for so long I was soo angry.  I would not go see my father after he passed away at his grave.  The times that I did go with my mom was when she needed to clean his grave site, I sat in the car.  How could God take someone away from me who could be such an important part of my life?
And I was angry at myself because I was laying in bed the night before and my dad and I
I broke down the other day about all the things
were heavy on my heart and this is where
I ended up!
had what turned out to be a TWO hour conversation that I, to this day, remember not one word that was spoken between us.  How could I not remember a single thing he said to me?!  I've been told that maybe one day I would remember that conversation and here is it almost 16 years later and I still don't remember a single word of it.  But how could God expect me to have the guidance of a father figure in my life when I had no father?  I was angry at him God for taking him away from me and I was angry with my father for leaving me.  I started going to church on a regular basis and became very active in my church, but no matter how much I loved the Lord that anger still remained inside of me.  
I remember going to a Wednesday night church gathering that happened every Wednesday for the middle schoolers.  It was judgement night.  This night was to help individuals fully grasps the concept of what would happen when we die; we would be judged by God and determine if we would stay with our heavenly Father or go to hell.  One thing that has always stuck with me from that night was that they said, "If you don't go to church, read  the Bible, or pray you will not be in heaven."  My father did none of those things unless my mother asked him to go to church with us.  I was scared that I would never see my Dad again after I died.
It is only just the other weekend, May 8th-10th, that I realized I was no longer angry with my dad (because he couldn't have controlled what happened) and God.  I actually for the first time in 16 years wanted to go visit my father (I cry just thinking about this), unfortunately I didn't.

The Lord continues to test me to this day and I have been angry with him lately.  Ever since I have moved out to my current location I have struggled with my finances and jobs.  I love God, but as soon as things start to get better I feel as if he is knocking me down again.  Why is he putting me through this!?

"The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them;
    he delivers them from all their troubles."
Psalm 34:17

God puts is through this things in life so that we can learn from them. 
 If you are having trouble with your finances...

“No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money."
Matthew 6:24

"For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs."
1 Timothy 6:10

If we spend our money irresponsibly, then he will not provide us with more but give it to those more responsible.

He also puts us through troubles to bring us closer to him.  Sometimes we stray from God, and as I think of this now it seems kind of cruel but we tend to cry out to the Lord only when things start to really go wrong, or we are worried about something.  It basically like that "friend" you have that only calls you when they need something, but otherwise never here from.  We are that friend!  We forget to praise him when things start to go or are going right too.  Imagine if we praised God more for when things go right in our lives that we might not end up crying out to him so much because things are going wrong!  Why do we seem to forget about the Lord when good things happen, a job promotion/opportunity, serving him, etc.

"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. "
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

We might work hard to get to this points in our lives but we could have worked harder for longer to get to that opportunity.  God places them in our paths when he feels that we are ready for them, and honestly not take advantage of the fact that he is placing them in front of you.  Your main mission should be to serve the Lord and to spread his word through a passion that you have.  My passion is fitness and nutrition.  
Even if we praise and thank God for the simplest of things; a quiet car ride somewhere, getting to have lunch with a good friend,  having a really good workout!  It's amazing how much we have to praise and thank God for.
So when we go through hard time just remember Philipians 4:6-7

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

It's okay to be angry with God.  He knows you are angry, and don't be afraid to express your anger to him.  It is through our joy and our pain that we become closer to the Lord. 




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