Learning From Loss

Most Valentine's Days we think about love and spending time with a significant other, whether you are married or dating someone.  This year Valentine's Day fell on a Sunday when most people would go to church.  And what do you guess the pastor would preach about, love right?  And preach mostly from

1 Corinthians 13: 3 - 8

" If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,  but do not have love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away."

But we touched on a little different. We heard about what you can learn from and about loss.  The more you love someone and become close to them, care, the harder it is to lose that person.  My pastor referenced 2 Samuel 12:15 - 24 and I'll touch on some of the points that we learned.

I. We all go through loss
One thing you have to realize during your loss is that you are not the only person who has had a loss.  Yours could be a family member while someone else could have lost a very close friend.  You also have to remember that it can happen at any age, even children before they know a family member.  I have lost my Uncle and my Grandfather on my Mom's side and I don't remember either one of them because I was just a baby.  I lost my father at age 11 and as I've gotten older I realize how it has effected me.  Fathers teach, well some, their daughters as they grow up how they should be treated by a guy they are dating.  Living without a father and not seeing those traits can be difficult.  I know how I should be treated as a woman by a man, and vice verse, but maybe if my father was still around I wouldn't put up with so much crap.  I believe that when you meet the right person you will be spoiled by the.  But that's beside the point. 

So what can we learn from loss?

II.  We each grieve differently. 
I remember when my father died that I handled it very differently from my brother and some other family members.  I had been at gymnastics all day and when we arrived at the hospital and were told the news.  I cried very little. I cried a little bit and then would stop and that pattern of emotion just continued.  I mostly stayed tough throughout the whole thing and kept mostly to myself when we went for group counseling once a week.  I didn't have much to say, it is what it is.  I had to stay strong for my family.  I remember the night we told my brother, which was the same day as my mother and I found out, and me telling him it would be okay.  He just cried back to me that it wouldn't.  I remember how hard he was crying when he said this back to me, my mom crunched down trying to comfort him, and my dry eyes and complete composer when I told him this.  I'm an introvert so I keep to myself a lot about things and this was one of them.  But no matter what we loss (job, family member, pet) we all handle and deal with that grief differently.  So whether you are dealing with grief yourself or someone who is going through it, just know that they may handle it differently than you do.

III.  You Can Heal
As we all deal with loss differently, sometimes those that are silent may need the most help.  We lose loved ones and we have mental "scars"  and after awhile those start to heal.  God said not to grieve like other nations because when they grieved they would cut themselves and leave physical scars.  We are not to have physical scars of our losses.  People cut to show their internal pain and this is a permanent scar, permanent reminder. 
God states in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, "Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who isin you, whom you have received from God?  You are not your own, you were bought at a price. Therefore, honor God with your bodies"
1 Corinthians 3: 16-17 says, "Don't you know that you yourselves are God's temple, and that God's Spirit dwells in your midst?  If anyone destroys God's temple, God will destroy that person; for God's temple is sacred, and you together are that temple."
Our bodies are something that we should cherish and not damage.  Some people may not leave physical scars like cutting but they cope in other ways such as food.  Let's put it in a different perspective...if you owned a beautiful house that you custom designed, or let go with something more practical, your smartphone or a new pair of shoes.  If the screen got cracked or you scuffed your shoes it's not as beautiful as it was before.  You'd be pretty upset.  You want to get your phone fixed or even clean or shoes.  You can to take care of them because it means something to you, as should your body.  We are not to carry around the scares of our losses, physically or mentally.  They are just a constant reminder of your losses and your past.  We are to look to the future; not our past.  Our past can only hold us back and destroy our future just like the story of Lot and his wife in Genesis 19:1-29.

IV.  You have to take responsibility of your life to move forward.
You have to remember that as painful as life may seem, you have a responsibility to yourself and others.  No one can help you move on from that loss but yourself.  Friends and family can be there to try and help but you never move on until you are truly ready to.  You have to become clean all over again.  You have to wash things off from the past, things that have never been settled/left unanswered.  You have to change your clothes (you attitude).  If you are constantly thinking negative thoughts, that's all you will see in your life.  You will never see the positive things, even the small ones.  If you don't change your attitude nothing is going to change for you, things will not get better.  You also have to seek God, anoint yourself, through the entire situation.  Look to him for guidance, some days may be better than others, but it is better than all days being bad.  You also have to eat well.  Take care of yourself physical, through food and exercise.  Remember your body is a temple of God, and that's important.  It is through your physical health that you are able to do so many things! Our bodies should to precious to us.  Why cause diseases or any unhealthy condition yourself?

V.  Be prepared for trigger events
There are always going to be things/triggers that are going to remind you of your loss and remind you of the good memories of who or what you have lost.  But those triggers can be put there for a reason.  They can

Always seeing Harley's is a trigger for me because
that's what my Dad loved. 

surprise you at anytime or can be expected, like certain events or dates.  But those triggers become blessings in your life.

VI.  Focus outward
Physical scars are constant reminders, making them an inward focus of what you've been through, and not letting you move forward.  But you need to focus outward.  Focus on the fact that there are others that are grieving as well.  You make be able to be the person that helps them through their grief.  Focusing outward can also help you to forget your own grief.  Even if your grief isn't the same as the person you are helping. 

"who comforts us in all our troubles,

 so that we can comfort those in any trouble

with the comfort we ourselves receive from God."

2 Corinthians 1:4

It is through our stories of grief that we can help others.  Our experiences of grief can become a resource to glorify God and help someone else know what we have learned.  Let our grief be a lesson to others.

VII.  God has a new dream for your life
When God takes something away from you, as long as you praise God through good and bad, he will provide for you again.  Sometime better than before, than you could imagine.  Know that God takes things away from you, no matter what or who it is, he has a different and bigger dream for you.  We are always too clouded by the current situation to see it at the time.   That we feel as if things will never get better, asking why God is and has put us through this.  He has a bigger plan for you my friend!

~God Bless

"Training strength and endurance mentally, physically, and spiritually."

Single's Awarness Day + Pin-ups & Baby J (BABs Week 2)

Last week, week 2, was a crazy week for me following the Badass Body Diet.  I had a lot of traveling last week and of course the temptation of the Valentine's Day Holiday and a baby shower.
Last Sunday was Valentine's Day or as the world is coming to call it now, "Singles Awareness Day."  Some of you may have noticed how Diary Queen was advertising a specialty blizzard taking notice of those many people that are single on Valentine's Day and according to recent studies, singles are outnumbering those that are in relationships and not just married.
I've always been a very independent individual and decided why wait for a man to do something for me when I could do it for myself.  I use to my buy flowers for myself when I was in high school and I took myself out to dinner one year for Valentine's Day.  This year I'm doing something special for myself that I've wanted to do for a couple years now ever since my friend told me about it, pin-up photos.
But this year was simple but still special in it's own way. 

~Valentine's Day~

I am a lover of breakfast and sometimes the most simple things are the most special.  I woke up that morning, unfortunately earlier than I would have liked to, and to my amazement got all my laundry done (including putting it away) before heading to church at 9am.  I have two loads of laundry and I start my darks the night before so that always helps.
But first thing is first when I wake up in the morning, breakfast.  I fixed myself some blueberry pancakes and I haven't had those in several months, along with some grits and egg whites.  I can't tell you how just thinking that breakfast was extra special because of some simple blueberries.  I always get to relax and enjoy my breakfast on the weekends, whereas during the week it's more of a time crunch to get out the door to head to the gym before work.  I buy stone ground  yellow grits so they are actually yellow and not the typical white grits you would see, and top them with some butter.  I grew up putting butter on top of my grits and pancakes, which is allowed on the maintainer category of the Badass Body Diet.
We also had a great sermon that morning which I will blog about later this week.  And like my pastor pointed out, you think that Valentine's Day is a day to preach about Love and most people when automatically gravitate toward 1 Corinthians 13:4-8
"If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.  Love is patient, love is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs (which most of us do).  Love does not delight in the evil but rejoiced with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Love never fails.  but where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away."
But we talked about what we have learned from dealing with loss and this is something that I have come to know in my personal life and through many experiences.

Losing a loved one or anything can make you lose confidence in life, and I from a very young age have never really had confidence in myself as someone who has felt beautiful. 

Pin Ups with Brandywine Photography

Wednesday night I headed home to Charlotte because making a little over 3 hour drive to Kings Mountain, NC was going to be a long drive, especially if I went there and back in the same day.  After all I would have to drive back home after the shoot that day.  I was excited and nervous all at the same time.  I have always wanted to take pin-ups with Brandy (Brandywine Photography) ever since learning about her from a friend a couple years back, just never took the time to save the money to do it.  Well, that time had come for me to finally do them when Brandy decided she was no longer going to be doing pin ups and focus on weddings, engagement photos and families as to spend time with her own family and be a mom.  As I learned from her on Thursday, her kids are home schooled and it has been their choice.  She is a lady to admire, not just off of her amazing work but for her I don't give a shit what other people think personality, and what she sees as beauty.  When first arriving at her house you just notice how huge it is and her welcoming smile.  She takes you down into the basement where she has racks of clothes hanging up for ladies to use for the different sets (bedroom, kitchen, library, etc.) and then a small room with a couch, a table set up for her makeup and hair supplies, and a hair dresser chair.  It's just casual conversation from there talking about each others lives, my lack of makeup skills because I don't own any, funny things here and there and of course a little bit of business thrown in there too.  O and the random thrown in conversation of

politics which neither one of us were bothered by because we both aren't voting.  How she got my hair to stay curled is beyond me, hairspray magic maybe, because my hair is so thin it usually doesn't hold a curl.  After finishing my hair and makeup she went and grabbed some clothes in my size.  I had more options than I thought I would and then left me alone for about 15-20min to try things on to see what I liked, and from there she helped me narrow it down. 

I chose the Lucille package, which was a 4 hour shoot, 2 indoor sets and 1 outdoor photo location.  I asked to go outside first since we started around 3pm and I didn't want to be standing outside when it started to really cool off outside.  So she took me a couple minutes away to the curve of a road that was across from a small lake or pond.  I had gone out of my comfort zone and ended up in leopard print lingerie.  It worked really well with our location because we were in some tall wheat colored grass, it could have been really tall weeds but it worked.  But the funniest part about the whole thing is on the way there she told me there wasn't a lot of traffic around that area.  As soon as we got out there a Jeep passed by and of course as anyone probably would, slowed down.  Another car passed by later and did the same thing but I think the best part was when we turned around to leave an older guy (I can't say that he was a gentleman) had parked his moped on the small hill across the road and decided he wanted to watch.  I was to busy focused on Brandy and she was to busy focused on me to even notice. Those things are silent! We both laughed about it and  headed back to her house and did a couple more shots on the back balcony which I loved some of those too.
Next was the purple lingerie set, which was by far my favorite considering one of my favorite colors is purple.  How could I have not have chosen that when it was one of my options?  We did several photos with this piece and even did one with a pose I had seen her post previously with another client at her old studio and completely fell in love with it. I can't tell you how excited I was when we did that one.  And Brandy is a butt person and I'm not going to lie my back and my butt are probably my favorite features about myself.  Well my butt anyway after these photos! 
I also wanted to do a military themed pin-up because I love being around the military so much.  It's one of the main reasons I haven't left where I am. 
I can say I would definitely do another military themed one but a different set because I've wanted to dress up in the military costume for so long I honestly can't believe I didn't do it this time.  We used a flag this time (as you can see I'm hoping for a future appointment with her). Then we moved into the library.  She took advantage of my years of gymnastics with this one, and we got some shots that some might be seen more artsy but one photo that I absolutely love because it's so different. 
This, almost, year has been an up and down roller coaster for me mentally and physically.  I wanted to do this shoot for me.  I have always loved the pin-up style but wanted to find myself again and to feel beautiful, sexy, confident in myself.  I have always struggled with this a lot most of my life, but especially lately.  It was time to do something for myself and to try and find that confidence in myself again.  I look at these pictures now and see a completely different person.  I only once thought about what I was wearing during the shoot but felt  completely comfortable in my own skin for once in my life around someone else and in lingerie.  I have honestly always felt embarrassed putting on lingerie and I have some in my closet that has never been worn because I am too embarrassed and self-conscious of what I look like to wear it for someone.  I can't explain how it feels to be care free for even just one day when wearing things like that.  It is definitely a battle within yourself of not feeling beautiful.  Yes, I have people tell me I am.  I just say thank you and brush it off.  But this day I didn't have any worries about what I looked like and I thank Brandy for that.  I felt beautiful, confident, sexy, and so many other things.

Trying to keep track of your nutrition while traveling can be difficult.  This a when you really need to plan ahead.  That day because I was leaving out of Charlotte and it was only a 50min drive to Kings Mountain I was able to eat lunch at the house, but for some I know when traveling this isn't possible.  That's when those tuna pouches tend to come in handy.  Or if you pack containers and a cooler then an quick tuna or chicken salad is possible.  That night since my shoot finished at 6pm I just packed a protein shake, chocolate peanut butter from ETB Fit (), half of a banana and 1tbsp of peanut butter and it was back home I headed.  So when you know you're going to be traveling for a while (couple hours) pack some easy portable foods like small bags of carrots, tuna/chicken pouches, apple sauce, fruits, etc.

Baby J

All the sweets

Saturday was the baby shower for Baby J, which I told you I would post about and how I would get through what I knew would be a ton of sweets for the event.  Baby J will be my nephew so I will be an Aunt all over again.  We are calling him Baby J because my brother and sister-in-law have yet to settle on a name for him.  They want my nephew's name to have the same initials as my brother, JRB, as my niece has the same initials as her mom, ADB.  They are stuck between two names, Jamison and John as a first name.  His middle name will be Russell and if they choose John my nephew will become a Jr.  Now I can't wait to hear what name they decide on. I'm voting for Jamison. Baby J is due in April, which will just add him to the long list of April birthdays we already have in the family.  Mine and Amber's, my sister in law's, birthdays are both in April.

"Dirt"



Gift bags

Because they are having a boy and my brother has been into dirt bikes, motorcycles, and baseball since he was young the food was all motorcycle themed.  They had "muddy tires," oreos dipped in chocolate; pretzels dipped in white chocolate (not sure what those were called); "dirt," crushed up oreos with mini chocolate covered donuts, which were one of my brothers favorites when he was little, and gummy worms.  My mom had made trays of fresh fruit (pineapple, strawberries, blueberries, and one other thing) and mini smoked sausages.  There was also a crockpot of meatballs, some cake, goodie bags, and my brother made some wings on his smoker which I proudly gathered and brought some home with me. I can't tell  you how hard it was for me to stay away from the "muddy tires."  They were looming at me just waiting for me to take one.  And I can't believe I resisted as many times as I looked at those things. I mean even the crushed oreos in the cups of dirt I wanted to dig for and this is coming from someone who as a child didn't like oreos because of the cookie.  I would always lick the cream out of the middle which I'm sure my brother despised me for at the time.  Luckily I coaxed a kid into taking the last oreo so I wouldn't cave in and eat it myself.  And the only other thing that kept me from eating it was know that I only had 1 more week to go on the Badass Body Diet.  I didn't want to go through 2 full weeks and then have to start all the way over for 1 and I mean ONE oreo cookie!

Smoked wings. My brother loves his smoker!

I was definitely a procrastinator when it came to grabbing my gift for my nephew; I picked it up 3 hours before the party.  I knew that Baby J was probably going to get the cute girlie boy clothes (if that makes sense) from people and my brother having always been into sports and motorcycles I couldn't let my nephew just be put in cute stuff after he was born.  A sister has to help her brother out.  So I went over to the Harley Davidson store to find Baby J some awesome clothes.  I also got him a pair of socks and one other thing.  But I can't wait for him to be born so I can be an Aunt all over again and to see him in his clothes that I got him.  I also got my niece a Harley Davidson shirt because I didn't want her to not have anything to open.  I didn't think she would completely understand what was going on and wanted her to have a present too. 
After the party I took my grandma home and then decided to take a nap.  Normally I only nap for an hour so I didn't set my alarm.  Well, apparently I was more tired than I thought because I slept for about 2.5-3 hours.  I slept passed dinner so I just ate my night time snack and binged or a couple hours on Netflix and back off to bed I went.  Being an introvert being around that many people can mentally exhaust you on top of a workout.

I'm officially now on my last week of the Badass Body Diet and I think I'm going to stick with it for one more week.
This week I have so far on my menu (dinner):
Paleomg's "Almost 5 ingredient Pizza Spaghetti Pie" 
Baked/Grilled Chicken
Salad
Meal Replacement Shake 

**If you are interested in having any photos taken for an event I highly recommend Brandywine Photography and have provided her link below to her site for contact.  You will not regret hiring her and if thinking about it, please book well in advance; she gets booked very quickly!

http://www.brandywinephotography.net

~God Bless

"Training strength and endurance mentally, physically, and spiritually."

I know that some people could be offended by the seemingly mild risqué photos that I have posted and these days we are judged all to quickly for doing something like this or showing off our bodies in this way.  But it's not really that much different from showing them off in workout attire.  I ask that you please read this below by Pastor Francis Anfuso

Naked

"Ever heard this statement? Since Adam and Eve were naked, obviously there’s nothing wrong with nakedness. In Genesis 2:25, although Adam and his wife were both naked, neither of them felt any shame. Shame has been defined as a negative emotion that combines feelings of dishonor, unworthiness, and embarrassment. Adam and Eve’s nakedness was far more than nudity. They were totally open and exposed before God and one another. Before the fall, they were naked, but didn’t see it as sinful. They were exposed, but not exploited! They were naked, but not immoral! They were unclothed, but not unprotected! They were undressed, but not uncovered! They were bare, but didn’t use one another! If you want to get back to the Garden! Live an honest, open and transparent life in the presence of God!"

BAB Week 1 + Working Out

When you restrict your food, you feel as if all those things still in the house are staring you in the face, speaking to you, telling you to eat them.  Well that's been me this week with honey and those Trio Girl Scout cookies in the freezer as I went through week 1 of the Badass Body Diet 21 strict days.  I'm not going to lie, see all the sweets in my freezer and not touching them as been hard!  Especially since the Trios are almost gone.  But not being to use honey has probably been the hardest.  Since starting I haven't been drinking my tea in the morning and it would have been perfect last week considering the weather was freezing cold!  Instead I have been drinking water which hasn't been to terrible, but I might have to start adding some flavor of fruits or veggies to it.  I use to add cucumber to my water and then eat the cucumbers afterwards.  But other than that the food hasn't been too bad.  I've been able to stay away from the extra peanut butter and cashews this past week.

Sunday is always meal prep day for me and I sometimes work on prepping on Saturday.  This past Sunday I did a lot of prepping.  One of the things I prepped which I'm extremely excited about are ribs.  It was a task to try and find a recipe for ribs that would comply with the standards I needed.  First was to find ribs that were: 1) pork and 2) didn't have a lot of fat on them.  I picked up some Louisiana style ribs made by Smithfield, probably not the best choice out there but there weren't any ribs that were plan and not prepackaged.  I'll have to do some roaming around in my area for this and let you know what I find.  I also had some ground turkey meat that I was going to make Mexican Turkey Meatloaf with from Paleomg.  This is one of my go-to recipes that I absolutely love.  I also had Sweet Potato Jalapeno Biscuits I was going to make, also from Paleomg.  The only thing with those is that I leave the shrimp out.  So it was going to be a busy Sunday.  Since Sunday was my last cheat day and Super Bowl Sunday I had ordered pizza and cheese bread from Papa John's. 

Ribs with BBQ Apple Sauce
I scoured the internet for paleo rib recipes because I knew they would have the most natural ingredients. Natural ingredients are the key! And the only sweetener that are usually found in paleo recipes are honey, coconut sugar, pure maple syrup or something similar to that effect.  Of course I had to click on several links before I found one that worked.  I finally found one from Paleo Leap with a BBQ Apple Sauce ( http://paleoleap.com/ribs-bbq-apple-sauce/ ).  I worked the recipe a little different than what the instructions called for.  I purchased unsweetened apple sauce (check the ingredients on the back to make sure there are no additives) from Wal-Mart.  I believe the brand was White House.  The recipe called for the ribs to be cooked in the oven but since I would be cooking the meatloaf in the oven I threw them in the crockpot, which is what I have been dying to do anyway.  I have been dying to try and cook ribs in my crockpot every since I heard that it was possible. O and I can't forget that I've been craving ribs for the past couple weeks, or was it that I just wanted to cook some in the crockpot.

Ribs (top R) with corn on the cob, mashed sweet potatoes w/
butter and small salad

Anyway I cut the rack of ribs in half and mixed up the dry rub.  It says to rub it on there but I sprinkled it and then rubbed.  I hate how it gets stuck to my fingers.  I'm not the ribs!  After that I placed them in the crockpot and I mixed up the bbq ingredients.  I will admit, I was lazy with the sauce.  I was suppose to heat and mix it up in a pan on the stove first and then bast  it on the ribs after they cooked for a little while but I just threw all the ingredients in the crockpot, but I'm saving this recipe again for later and will actually do what the recipe calls for with the sauce before throwing it in the crockpot.  Cooking it on the stove first helps to blend all the ingredients together.  I also skipped out on the minced onion because I hate having my eyes water and when I was going through my vegetable drawer last night I'm glad I did because my onion had grown mold from me trying to use it once before and failing because of my crying eyes.  So into the crockpot with the wet ingredients and some more dry ingredients.  From there I placed the crockpot on high and cooked them for 4-5 hours.  And let me tell you, the aroma that was coming out of that crockpot...
The ribs are still going strong and were part of my Valentine's dinner with corn on the cob and sweet potato jalapeno biscuits.  I look at those ribs and my mouth starts going crazy, even just writing about them now  It is definitely a recipe that you need to check out!

Other things that I prepped for this week were Paleomg's Mexican Meatloaf and I use ground turkey meat instead of beef because it's leaner and I also don't put in all the ingredients, part of my lazy moments in cooking but I do add red pepper flakes to add some spice back into it for taking out some of the other ingredients.  The other thing I have been fixing is chicken breast.  I use a lot of seasoning on them and sometimes I just use pepper and place it on my George Foreman.

The Aesthetics Of It All
I can already see a difference after week 1 and am looking forward to the final results.  I did use one of my cheats on Sunday, which is a typical cheat day for me already but not like on the Badass Body Diet. So when I say a cheat day for me on the Badass Body Diet all it means is that I add extra carbs into my diet at my night time snack and carbs that are approved on the diet.  I love my homemade ice cream so instead of half a banana I use a whole one and I add a single serve bag of popcorn with some melted butter which is also allowed on the maintainer program.
But also along with cutting out the suer is how your body should feel.  You should feel more energized during the day and it could also help with moods.  All the processed foods and sugar can make you feel sluggish and not as euphoric as not having it might be. I'm not really sure how my body is feeling after cutting out the other sweets but it could take awhile for me to notice it since there wasn't a huge change in my diet.  But being able to notice even a subtle bit of a difference is all that I ask.

This picture is from this past Sunday.  On the left is a picture from Day 1 and the picture on the right is from this past Sunday.  I can notice some of the difference on my hips and stomach which is what I was looking for, but of course before Day 1 I did have pizza and cheese bread from Papa John's so this could be a result of not having my normal cheat days on Sunday.

The Challenge
So I'm going to have a big challenge this week as well as this weekend.  On Thursday I will be having my self-gifted Valentine's Day present which requires a 3+ hour of traveling and then having some fun during my meal times which is going to be a little hard when I get hungry so hopefully I can work around that and still have my snacks and meals.  The other challenge is going to be my sister-in-laws baby shower this weekend.  And with showers come all the sweets.  Luckily my mom and I are in charge of doing the fruit tray for the party so I will have the option of fresh fruit, and this will be around my snack time during the day so I should be able to work that out.  I will just have to be good and try and resist all the munching of other things that will be set out and I'm sure all the sweets that will be there as well.  I'm not going to lie, Saturday is going to be a very tough challenge while at the baby shower but I'm looking forward to seeing how I do during it.  I'm really scared that I'm going to cave in and eat something I'm not suppose to.  And you would have thought that someone who eats healthy most of the time wouldn't have any issues with it.  Normally, if I wasn't on this 21 days strict, I wouldn't care and would just probably eat a cupcake or at least the frosting and be good to go but not this time around.  Being home with family is always a challenge because the unhealthy foods are there in front of my face.  Whereas when I'm at my place those unhealthy foods don't exist in my house and if they do I have them stashed to where I can't deliberately see them when I open up the cabinet or refrigerator door.  I will keep you posted on the goodies for the party this weekend and from the Valentine's Day present on Thursday to let you know how I did!

~God Bless

"Training strength and endurance mentally, physically, and spiritually."

Starting Over

I woke up this morning with some sort of kick start in my brain.  I have been letting something affect me for so long, coming up on a year in a couple months.  I have tried my best to not let this life situation affect me, but I only thought about it in terms of things I went and did, but nothing further than that. It will probably still affect me more than I would like for it to, but I'm going to try and change that.  As much as I have control over anyway.
I start a long time ago studying for my CSCS (Certified Strength & Conditioning Specialist) but stopped when other things in my life needed a lot of focus.  Only to realize today that getting that certification could actually help me out career wise.  So I'm starting all over on studying to get this certification and I worry how in the world I will be able to remember all this information that I need to know for the test that I've heard people have to retest on certain sections.  But I'm going to be studying like crazy and reviewing sections. Hoping that it will all stick when it comes time that I take my test.
The Atkins diet, Low Carb diet, Flexible dieting, Badass Body Diet, South Beach diet Badass Body diet
There are so many diet trends out there these days it's hard to keep up with what works and what doesn't, what is the healthiest diet trend out there.  But I hate calling some of them diets.  If they are the proper ones then I call it healthy eating because it is how we should naturally eat. 


Badass Body Diet Before (June/July 2015)

I remember when I was in high school/college I thought it was gross of women to have defined abs (visible 6-packs), today I think differently.  I have gotten more into fitness than I was back then and although I think it can be taken too far when it comes to aesthetics, I now think that defined abs on a women isn't gross at all. 
So last year I had a goal of wanting to lean out my body 1) for my own happiness and 2) to get back at the things that had affected me.  I was currently sitting at 121 lbs (pictured right) and wanted to stay there but wasn't happy with some of the areas I saw.  And this is where I am at now.  Looking at my body you probably wouldn't say there was a thing wrong with it, but I notice some things that I would like to change here and there.  We're are own worse critic right? So last year Christmas Abbott published her book, The Badass Body Diet, so I decided to check it out and give it a shot.  I read through the book, figured out my body type, and looked through the sample diet plans which I only paid attention to my particular body time and gave it a shot. The ____ is to go through 21 strict days of following the plan she put in place, and of course you could adjust from there after the twenty-one. I had great results after the 21 days (pictured below).  If you cheated within the 21 days then you had to start all over.  Kind of motivating to stay strict if you don't want to start over for another 21 days huh?  The only difference between the pictures besides the physical appearance that you notice was I only lost 1/2lb in my weight. 



Badass Body Diet Post 21 days 2015

So because of what has affected my life for almost a year and the recent 2 months of eating things I shouldn't have, I'm starting over.  I've posted some of the things I've eaten on my Grace Fitness facebook page and my instagram (tblack88) but what you don't see is the extra heaping spoon of peanut butter I shove in my mouth after eating my nightly snack (the picture that pops in my head on that description...) or the bag of girl scout cookies I've been slowly digging into, the Trios (trying to be sneaky).  The things I have posted on instagram and my Grace Fitness page are compliant with the Badass Body Diet but those are my main meals throughout the day.  Snacks at night are a completely different story. I've had some days where I have stuck it out on my night snack and other days I just have that craving and completely cave.  I try to stick to things I'm allowed to have but on occasion that cookie sneaks in.  As I start this process over again I am trying to think of some of the foods that I will miss. Besides my Sunday cheat dinner + dessert the only thing I will be missing while on the 21 days is not having honey to put in my herbal teas.  I enjoy warm tea as part of my morning snack, but even though it smells amazing it doesn't taste as great when its just the tea.  So I would use a spoonful of all natural honey in my tea to add a little bit of sweetness.  But gone is the sugar for 21 days and today marks Day 1 on the Badass Body Diet.  I'm going to admit, taking out the sugar besides my fruits is going to be hard but I've done it before and I can do it again.   Below are my beginning pictures and as much as I wish I could tell you my beginning weight I currently don't have a scale that works.  Not only does cleaning up your diet change your image, but it effects your hormones as well.  This is way I have posted a picture of my amazing (full of sarcasm) on here as well.  As you can see in the picture my face is broken out, more than the usual, and a lot of it can be stress but a lot of it has to do with my diet as well.  So I'm going to try and post some weekly updates for you but also want to blog about other things as well.  I've gotten on this fitness blogging kick lately and as much as I enjoy that and helping you out I still love my spiritual blogs and have really missed writing them for you.  So I will drag you along on this 21 day re-journey and post some of those mouth watering meals I have during the process.This week I have fixed: Apple BBQ pork ribs (Paleo Leap) via crockpot, sweet potato jalapeno muffins (PaleOMG) and Mexican Turkey Meatloaf (PaleOMG), and some chicken I haven't decided what to do with yet!


Badass Body Diet (Feb 8th 2016) Round 2

Badass Body Diet - Round 2 (Feb 8th 2016)

Because your diet can effect your skin I figure I would
post a picture of how much my breakouts are affected by
my eating habits

~God Bless

"Training strength and endurance mentally, physically, and spiritually."