Since January, besides what I've written that has really gone into detail about my present day activities, I've had: my car stolen (it's still galavanting around without me), bought a new car, started the Dave Ramsey Total Money Makeover, competed in an oly meet, cancelled my birthday trip, replaced it with a trip I practically didn't have to pay for, and registered for Nationals.
Okay so first...
My car was stolen at the end of January. Coincidentally, on the 5 year anniversary of me moving out here. I had the morning off and went down to warm up my car like I always do because it takes it forever to get warm. A van was pulling in when I went down and I was a little suspicious of it. I lingered at my car for a bit and finally went back upstairs but left my apt door open and stood there and watched to make sure no one got into my car. When the van pulled away I shut my apt door. When I went to leave my apt not even 5min later, my eyes were seeing everything correctly but my brain literally had to do a double take.
I was barely upset about it because there wasn't much I could do at this point besides call the police and insurance and report it. I realized how truly blessed I am with my co-workers and people in my bible study class. A co-worker's husband came and picked me up and gave me a ride to work. And later that day another co-worker that I dog sit for let me borrow an extra car that they had until I found another car or mine was miraculously returned. I only had it for 2 weeks.
So I found myself another car only two weeks later. And as much as I could have just bought another car to get myself by. I didn't want to get another car that I just thought of as a filler until I finally got my dream car. So I decided to go ahead and bite the bullet and buy my dream car. No my dream car isn't brand new but a newer body style. And I finally have my dream car and I absolutely love it. A car I actually want to take care of!
My Total Money Makeover
My finances are always something I've always been very self-conscious about. I was doing well when I first moved here. But after switching jobs several times I've found a job that I love but it doesn't pay a lot. And finances are a stressor for me. I've been self-conscious that people will judge me by the amount of money or the lack there of that I make and even to the point where someone wouldn't want to date me because of it. So, Dave says to pay for everything in cash. It's all a new process to me and pulling a lot of money out of my paycheck scares me, it's true. When you see the money leaving your had, you're less likely to spend it. He has 7 Baby Steps
BS1: $1000 emergency fund (which I've had for awhile)
BS2: snowball method all debt (least amount first to largest amount) My total is around $14,8000
BS3: 3-6 months living expenses
These are the main 3 I'm focused on right now. My goal for BS2 is when I hit my car payments full on, I can pay my car off in 3.5-4 years. I have to finish paying my mom off first (for my stolen car).
I'm scared about this process but super excited as well!
Queen City Classic
Well before QCC, I had a meet in February in Cary.
I hadn't trained anything over 70% of my oly lifts so coach and I agreed just to have fun with it and use it as platform time.
My numbers were 57/63/120 (snatch/clean & jerk/total - for those that don't follow olympic lifting). Off my best total by 6kg. Huge different in my opinion
So moving on...
Queen City Classic was only 2 weeks ago, but it feels like longer. We dropped my weightless down to 53kg (I was a 58) in order to get my body use to being at this weight and make it easier to qualify for Nationals - finals in December. I weighed in where I was suppose to. This meet definitely didn't go as I had planned. I had been hitting 90% of my maxes in training for the past 3 weeks prior to this meet so I was feeling confident about hitting these percentages. Instead of having an awesome meet, I only went 2/6. By far my worst meet ever!
And this 2/6...those 2 were my last attempts for each lift. It was a very close call to not making a total at all! After beating myself up for about a week and a half I finally realized that I had done well despite what I felt was a terrible performance. It was also my first meet with my coach being there to coach me in person through a meet since January of last year!
I had dropped a weight class and increased my total by 5kg since my previous meet
120kg total @ 58kg BW
125kg total @ 53kg BW
Can only go up from there.
So at the beginning of April I registered for the American Open Series 2 in King of Prussia, PA. I'm super excited to be traveling for a meet. It will be my first National meet It would be awesome to attend a meet in each state and even compete in an international meet. So off to PA I go in July. I will also come back to post the link so if anyone wants to watch because the meet will have a live feed on USA Weightliftings website.
Here's the link to the website and I'll post it again closer to time and what day/time/platform I will lift on at the comp.
https://www.teamusa.org/USA-Weightlifting
So you'll be updated on that just incase you want to watch. But I'm excited about going to Amish country on my day off and exploring some of PA
Travel
My feel like my soul has been more of a paper airplane lately, just wanted to be light and explore the world. It's wanting to be anywhere but here and traveling and hiking the world. My heart for some reason is screaming to be out west. Which was part of the reason I was so looking forward to heading to Arizona. My soul belongs outdoors and exploring. I was looking forward to seeing the Grand Canyon and hiking to Havasu falls. But it will be put on the bucket list for a later trip. I had to logically cancel the trip because of my car getting stolen and having to purchase another one. Other factors contributed to the cancellation of the trip. One of the requirements to hike to Havasu Falls (10mi hike) is that you can not hike alone. My friend that was suppose to go with me backed out about a month in advance so that left me scrambling to find someone else to go with me so I could experience this amazing place. Not to mention that this reservation sells out very quickly every year, so you need to call the day that the Reservation opens up reservations. It's located on Indian lands so hiking there requires a permit which you can't get unless you are booked to stand on the grounds.So after the hassle of cancelling my flight and getting my money back for it my mom had all these extra points to go somewhere that needed to be used before the end of June and I still had my flight voucher I needed to use after coming back from Colorado last year. So knocking a different place off the bucket list it was...New Orleans, Louisiana!
Now granted this was a place that Fidget and I had talked about meeting before his first deployment when he moved back to WA 2 years ago. Welp, I'm going now. Mostly likely by myself but I'm super excited. I'm getting out there and traveling like I've always wanted. And PA is just an addition to that list but definitely wasn't on my list of places to go. But traveling for meets I'm not opposed to since it's one of the things I would like to do.
Fidget.
So you've heard about Fidget a lot, and this will probably be the last time you hear about him. As much as I would like for him to remain apart of my life in the way that I have wanted him to, that's just not reality.
A song comes to mind when I think about things now.
"Like I Loved You" by Brett Young, I can always have feelings for him and part of me probably always will but I've realized that he will never feel about me they way I have felt about him. As much as it sucks and I feel stupid for feeling those feelings, that's the reality of the situation. I guess it's just hard because I was more open with him about things, more comfortable with him than I ever have been with someone else. And it's scary when that person decides they don't to be apart of your life anymore.
Let me go back a bit. If you've never heard that song by Brett Young before, then it's basically a guy singing about how much he loved a girl and when they split up she's okay with being friends and him seeing other people, whereas, the guy is on the complete opposite end of that. It's hard for him to be friends with her since he loved her and he's not okay with the idea of her dating other people because of his love for her. So they never truly felt the same kind of love for each other.
And I'll admit, it sucks because I'm lonely and just want to be in love but at the same time I don't know if I ever want to feel that or be that comfortable with someone again. And I'm sure with time those feelings will probably go away but I'll probably be very hesitant about anyone.
Now Fidget does want to be friends and I'm honestly not sure. I told him we could be which just means randomly talking when he reaches out to me, but he feels comfortable sharing things with me like he always had although he did close himself off after his last work trip and I felt like I have had to pull back A LOT!! I have to think that I have to do what's best for me in this situation. I've never been friends with any of my exes and I'm not sure how to do this.
But anyway the next I'll be writing is during/after New Orleans
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